neck kisses, wrist kisses, the palm of my hand kisses|
armpit kisses, inner thigh kisses, delicate pink nipple kisses
soft kisses, slow kisses, each of my tattoos kisses
audible kisses, soaking wet kisses, taking me to heaven kisses
I am a highly sensual person and my body is very awake to touch with kisses being one of my favourites. It was actually through the lens of sensual dominance where I learned that it’s not just the more obvious parts of me that I want slowly devoured. I would feel so aroused while slowly directing my lover to kiss every inch of my long soft legs before rewarding him with kisses through or beneath my lace or latex lingerie. In a Girlfriend Experience capacity, this mutual soft devotion and exploration of one another is incredibly erotic and felt worth a blog post of its own.
Recently I was discussing this very topic with one of my dates. He is a gorgeously sensual lover who shares my fondness of all-over kisses and explained that for him, great sex is about intimacy. I think this perfectly illustrates why I love slow sex; the intimacy of being alone together, of being naked with each other, and of our undivided attention.
I rarely attend a date without massage oil in my bag, because as part of sex or relaxing afterwards an oily naked massage is delicious. I like to put massage oil all over my body, drenching my breasts and hands and you. This can also be a great pace setter because it’s simultaneously relaxing yet arousing and I love the slow eroticism or hungry impatience it invites.
When I chat about my work with those outside of the industry, they are sometimes surprised to learn that most of the men who book me sexually please me. Or, are actively open to learning to be better lovers. Mainstream culture would have them believe most men are looking for a neatly packaged rough, submissive Porn Star Experience. Of course, there’s nothing wrong with offering or booking those services – but even this remit can be nuanced, kinky and with interesting role play angles.* Admittedly when I entered this world I didn’t know which direction my brand, business and services would take me, it sort of just naturally grew into what it is today. It quickly became apparent that I attract those seeking intimacy, adventure and escapism vs specific sexual services which means we get to explore a variety together.
*I do not offer any Porn Star Experience services.
“How can I be great, or at least better in bed?”
I am often asked this question by men who want to improve their skills or who feel their wife or partner lacks the confidence or knowledge to ask for what she likes. Firstly I am always warmed by this question, but I can’t really answer for all women just because we share the same anatomy. One week I may meet a man who wants to be deeply humiliated complete with pain play and watersports and the next someone who wants a really affectionate, cuddly date; just as men have wildly different sexual desires, so do women.
However, physically speaking, one of the main things to consider as a man is that great sex doesn’t start and end with your cock (unless you have a deeply submissive girlfriend who gets off on simply giving). Just as I have a highly sensitive and sensual body, so do you, by limiting yourself to penetration you are denying yourself a whole world of exploration and satisfaction. This is also true when focussing solely on whether a woman orgasms, it is very easy for me to orgasm, I can make myself orgasm in around 10-15 mins but if I wanted to do that I would just use my own paws or a vibrator. This style of rushing to the finish line is essentially masturbating with each other’s bodies and lots of well-intentioned men can end up doing this with their partner’s body and then wondering why she appears to not be very sexual. We can use one another in a specific way for ten minutes to both reach climax but what’s the point? If we’re having sex together let’s spend 30-45 mins languidly undressing one another, discovering how to pleasure one another and within that, we can enjoy the things we love to reach orgasm.
“How can I make you, or any woman orgasm?”
Another thing to note, (which may not be true for all women, but I held an Instagram poll recently and found that over 80% of 280 female voters agreed) is that for me to orgasm with a partner I need to feel safe. By that, I don’t mean that you’re going to harm or secretly record me, although of course the fundamentals of making sure we feel safe alone with you need to be met! But what I really mean is safe in your abilities and understanding of my body. As a man, it’s much easier for you to finish and for your partner to be sure you have. Whereas for me, I may have the equivalent of secretly walking around with a hard-on until I can satisfy myself – it’s just not visible! So to avoid this I sometimes subconsciously diminish the pleasure so that it’s enjoyable but won’t take me over the edge. My mind is therefore as important as my physical being and ensuring I know we’re not going to suddenly change direction or finish without warning.Essentially, if it all feels a bit rushed I, (and potentially other women), don’t unlock our minds to going there. For example, if I think it’s all centred around penetrative sex that inevitably finishes when the man is done, I won’t risk my invisible hard-on for the next few hours until I get home in case I can’t finish before he has. I can only orgasm through penetrative sex if I have already orgasmed clitorally and many women (although remember we are all different!) are the same. This is not an invitation for you to obsess over orgasms on our next date or with any female partner, but more offering advice on how to build that delicious trust.
So essentially the best way to make me – and perhaps other women – feel safe enough to really let go and enjoy the physical rush, is to awaken our bodies and minds by slowing right down and not rushing towards the finale.
If you’re a prospective client wishing to plan a slow sensual date please fill out my New Client Booking Form, (I recommend reading my FAQ’s first too!). Existing friends can contact me via WhatsApp, Signal or email.